Inspiration and Hope

Image courtest graur codrin at
Image courtest graur codrin at

Blake stands in a corner, shuffling and swaying, praying his fervent best before he begins what looks like a dance – part Bunny Hop, part Cha Cha.  He gives one last look up toward the heavens (actually the ceiling of our kitchen), looks satisfied and walks away.  My hubby and I have been sitting close by, working on a project, but taking in the scene all the same.  When Blake is safely out of earshot, my husband looks at me with wide eyes.  He’s trying to find the humor in this.

“I don’t know what religion that is, but it isn’t mine,” he says with a half-smile.

We must do this – try to find the humor, the funny side of our 14-year-old son’s compulsions – in order to keep going.  It’s a way of maintaining the peace, of staying sane, and of not crumbling into a mess of argument and discord.  The truth is, we are sad that our son chooses OCD’s ways over defeating the disorder.  Yet we have to let him come to his decision to accept treatment when he is ready.

Along those lines, I found myself inspired this week by a young man who did just that.  He sought treatment for himself.  He’d contacted me because he’d done his research.  He recognized that he had OCD and it was affecting his life to such a degree that he was willing to do whatever it took to get better, including driving well over an hour to meet with me.  I was inspired because this young man, barely an adult, empowered himself and chose to get better.  I am committed to helping him get there.

What made me sad, though, is that he is all alone in his recognition that he has OCD.  No family member or friend is aware.  He is that good at hiding it – at least that’s what he tells me.  Either way, he and I are the only ones who have ever discussed that he is suffering.  While it is an honor to share knowledge of his story, it is my honest hope that, as he progresses through treatment, he will find the courage to share this with another supportive soul in his life.

When I meet a young person like this, it gives me hope, once again, that one day Blake will decide that living according to OCD’s rules is not worth it.  I hope that he, too, will find the courage, either with our knowledge or without, to brush up on his OCD fighting skills and put the disorder in its place once again.

11 thoughts on “Inspiration and Hope

  1. It is really hard time to love south as a parent and want the best for our kids, even when we don’t agree. Blessings to you and yours and thank you for the reminder to laugh 🙂

  2. I always admire your determination to give your son the space and time to find his own way. I can only imagine how terribly difficult that must be for the rest of you – even when you make the effort to find the humor. Thinking of you! – Amy

  3. Oh yes, humor and hope, both very important words! There were times (granted, not too many) we could even get Dan to laugh about his OCD. That always gave me hope for his recovery, because his laughing confirmed he saw the futility and ridiculousness of it all. Blake will get there; I know he will!

  4. I’m so glad that you are there to help this patient. And that you are there to help everyone else who reads your blog; although you may not see us in treatment, I suspect that most of us (your readers) are greatly impacted by the stories you share . I know I am. Thanks.

  5. Definitely, take heart and humor wherever you can. It is a difficult journey for all involved, and I certainly don’t envy anyone battling alone, or for that matter anyone sitting on the outside looking in.
    OCD is a hard enough to work through when you can make the choices, but I admire the patience and courage it must take to stand by and watch and wait.
    But truly even watching you are still helping, because Blake knows you are there to support him. That you will be there for him whenever he’s ready to work on his OCD, or tackle any other problem he may have for that matter.

    Remaining the rock which he can lean on when he is weary while you wait is important too, it is the foundation for trust in helping him once he is set.
    Hang in there.

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