An Unexpected Find

A little while back I wrote a post about recognizing that my father, who passed away in March of this year, likely had Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD) (Read: OCD: It’s All In My Family). I’d been attending a conference when something I heard a speaker say sparked a recognition in me that my father probably had OCD, and I lamented not connecting the dots sooner, especially given that I am a psychologist who is an OCD and anxiety disorders specialist.

Since my dad passed, my siblings, my mom, and I have very slowly begun the process of sorting through some of his belongings. The other weekend, my brother and sister-in-law were in town so we spent some time looking through his things for keepsakes we would like. It was dusty, emotional, and sometimes humorous – and even just a bit surprising.

At one point, I perused the books on a shelf in the bedroom and noticed this tucked amongst the titles.

This is a book written by two pioneers in OCD work – Fugen Neziroglu, Ph.D., and Jose A. Yaryura-Tobias, M.D. The copy in my parents’ home had a copyright date of 1995. At first, I wondered if my mom might’ve picked it up to learn more about OCD after Blake was diagnosed. She’s always been interested and wanting to know more. But I wondered if that could be, given that this book was published more than a decade before Blake was diagnosed and four years before he was even born.

I shuffled down the hallway to find my mom in the family room. I showed her what I’d found. She seemed a little unsure, but she thought she’d picked it up for my father at some point because she must’ve thought reading it would be helpful for him. I asked if I might have the book and, having been given permission to take it, gently placed it on my bookshelf at my private practice office. There it sits, among my many other books about OCD and anxiety. I hope to read it soon, but for the meantime it represents a piece of my own history that I didn’t even know existed. I didn’t know I’d become an OCD specialist. I didn’t know OCD was in my family. Yet, there it was, just beneath my awareness, waiting to be discovered.

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